Explode
by Bite The Dust
Summary: In a world where Suwabara Kai was born Suwabara Kaoru, Monica Adenauer is exactly the same. F/F


**This pile of what's sure to be poorly written degenerate debauchery and lewdness is for my bestest best friend Sera, who's been with me through thick and thin, who's cooler than the other side of the pillow, and more fun than rice krispie treats. I love you, buddy!  
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**Well... Here you go.**

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><p>Monica Adenauer sat on the ridiculously comfortable and soft couch upside-down, with her feet in the air and her head hanging off of the edge of the cushions, feeling the fall sunshine and cool breeze stream through the open <em>shōji<em> porch doors and onto her tired body, worn from cleaning the old Japanese-style house from top to bottom, only half-listening to the TV show she wasn't exactly watching... And was troubled.

Waiting for her girlfriend to get home from work every day was boring. And she felt bad for mooching. Kaoru had insisted that she shouldn't feel like she was taking advantage, but she did just the same. She had thought it was a great idea to wait a couple months after coming to Japan to start looking for a job, an idea that became even more appealing with the drama of Kaoru's emotional breakdown, and then recovery, after the death of her master, but she'd had no clue how incredibly, horrifically, mind-numbingly dull being a homemaker was.

But her employment situation wasn't what troubled her, that could be fixed whenever she wanted by leaving the house and walking around town until she found a patisserie, going up to the management, and telling them her name. What troubled her was Kaoru.

The beautiful girl with the coal black hair in the messy bob tied back with the blue bandanna that made her look like Rosie the Riveter, and the sharp, fiercely intelligent brown eyes belying a tender and clement heart, the person she genuinely felt was her true love... Had no clue what sex was.

One night after the two of them had lay down for bed, facing each other in their side-by-side futons, she'd brought the subject up completely without tact, with the hope that she would catch her girlfriend off guard and make her face turn red- which she thought was adorable as all hell- since she had been meaning to bring it up anyway.

"Hey, are you still awake?" She had asked, even though she knew she was.

Kaoru had already shut her eyes and was making an actual effort to fall asleep, so "Mmmmm..." Was all the response she got.

"Why haven't we fucked yet?"

The other girl's eyes fluttered open. "... What?"

"I said why haven't we fucked yet."

She frowned. "It's not that I can't hear you, I'm less than a meter away."

Monica blinked. "Sex. Why haven't we had it?"

"I still don't follow." She frowned harder, a crease appearing in the smooth skin of her forehead.

"Making love, bumpin' uglies, doing _it_-"

"Go to sleep, Monica." She rolled over to face away from her, and promptly took her own advice.

She brought it up again the next morning, figuring that she was just tired and didn't understand her question, but no, she blew off her inquiries every time, and the only conclusion she could come to was that the woman was totally and completely clueless and trying to hide it- Regardless of the less common woman on woman variety, even the procreative heterosexual kind was completely foreign to her.

Monica couldn't fathom how any human being living in a first-world country during the information age made it to adulthood without having a clue about something so vital, but if someone could manage, it was definitely going to be her darling samurai girl.

She flipped her body over so that she was lying face up on the couch, grabbed a throw pillow that was resting against one of the arms, put it over her face, and screamed at the top of her lungs.

Holy shit was she horny.

She'd spent most every day masturbating until she was nearly raw and still the thrumming ache in her belly persisted. How could she help it? She lived with a goddess- a warrior princess with a body made for wet dreams, small, perky breasts, strong, flat stomach, round hips, strong legs, and an ass you could bounce a quarter off of...

She was just about to slip her hand down the front of her shorts again before she heard the voice of her beloved call from the entrance to the house, "I'm home."

She threw the screamy pillow back to where it was supposed to be and sat up just as Kaoru rounded the corner into the den. She made a big show of jumping up off of the couch and walking toward the object of her love and lust with what she hoped looked a lot like normalcy and not at all like she was holding her thighs together has hard as she could.

She flung her arms around her darling's waist, feeling her stiffen for a moment and then slowly melt, as she always did when she was touched, and said softly next to her ear, "Welcome home, baby."

She didn't need to look at her love's face to know it was turning a lovely shade of pink right about now, but strong arms wrapped around her neck just the same.

Even in the baggy Pantasia uniform and slacks, she was the pinnacle of femininity and vigor. The top of Kaoru's head came up only about to her chin, super-short to Monica's low average height.

God, she was gonna go fucking nuts if they didn't have sex _today_.

She took a step back, put her hands firmly on the smaller woman's shoulders, stared deeply into her eyes, and told her "There's something seriously important we have to talk about, like, right now."

A concerned look marred the other girl's face. "What is it?"

Keeping her hands on her shoulders, Monica sat them both down on the couch. "I'm just gonna be completely straight with you about this, okay? We love each other, so there shouldn't be any secrets between us."

Now Kaoru was even more uneasy. "Of course not. Please, tell me what's wrong."

She took a deep breath, hung her head and said, "Sex is something that happens between two people when they love each other very much-"

"_What_?!"

"-well, they don't actually have to love each other, I guess, since it's pretty fun with whoever-"

"I-I don't... You-"

"-anyway, we love each other so it's something we definitely need to be doing-"

"_Monica_-"

"-and if I don't see you naked sometime soon I'm probably gonna throw myself under a train-"

"_Shut up_!"

She promptly shut up.

Because of Kaoru's small stature, it was doubly disconcerting whenever she used her voice to its full roaring potential. She looked up again, completely expecting her to have fury and outrage written all over her face, but what she saw instead was shame.

Girding her loins but softening her voice, she continued, "I get this is embarrassing for you, sweetheart, but this is something I really, really have to explain to you-"

"That's not it, you idiot! I, I..." She swallowed hard, and said, "I already know all of that."

Monica blinked at her, confused. "Huh?"

"Don't tell me you _honestly_ thought someone lived to adulthood in this day and age without knowing what _sex _was?"

"Uh..."

"I just- I know you've had experience with this kind of... Activity before, and I, I didn't want you to realize how incompetent I was, so I just ignored your questions about love making." She scowled and gritted her teeth. "You're so affectionate and doting and I'm completely unused to human physical contact-"

"Okay, wait a minute, it's your turn to shut up now." Said Monica, and the other girl shut her mouth with a click.

"You think I'd be disappointed in you or whatever because you've never had sex before? That's bull, baby. I love you no matter what. And..."

She slid the scant inches between them on the couch to sit on her knees over Kaoru's lap, bringing one arm around her torso and placing the other on the back of her head, pulling her cheek to her breast, causing the smaller girl to start before she let the softness and sweet scent of her lover soothe the mortification from her confession. "... My darling, I will gladly teach you anything you need to know."

Kaoru took a remarkable leap and loosely snaked her arms around Monica's hips, and reveled in the tingling sensation caused by the contrast of the roughly calloused and burned hands removing the piece of cloth she used to hold back her hair and carding smoothly through the coarse black strands. It was a sensation that she was completely new to, and though being touched even by this person that she trusted the most in the world made her ill-at-ease, something about the fingertips so slowly and carefully massaging her scalp was making her feel...

Her breath hitched.

Her lover did not fail to notice this.

"Oh-ho? You like having your hair messed with, is that it?" Monica cupped her jaw and tilted her face up, so that their lips were barely apart at all.

She swallowed. "I, I suppose I do." Her lips parted. She whispered, "Please don't stop."

The sultry giggle that escaped her lover's mouth then was so exciting that it frightened her a bit.

And she loved it.

Monica closed the distance between their lips slowly- or maybe not so slowly, for some reason her sense of time felt kind of skewed- and her lips were soft and silky, and she had to taste her _right now_. She flicked her tongue over Kaoru's mouth, taking her time, tasting, nipping, teasing, until the stimulation caused her mouth to fall open, and she slipped her tongue inside. She slid it across the identical slick muscle in the unfamiliar mouth, until it responded in kind, and she let it explore her own mouth. The smaller girl extracted her legs from under Monica's, sitting up on her knees until their heights were much more balanced, and suddenly hands were everywhere, breasts and tummies and pelvises were rubbing together, and it was so-

The two women shrieked as they toppled unceremoniously off of the couch.

"Ow, ow ow!" Groaned the redhead, "Are you okay? I fell weird and hit my funny bone..."

Kaoru sat upright and rubbed her jaw. "I'm alright, but I might have bit my tongue."

Monica was immediately better and bounced up off of the floor to offer her darling her hand, and smiled wickedly. "Do you want me to kiss it better?"

Kaoru took the proffered hand and used it to help herself up. "You of all people would know how to alleviate the pain from a cut, so if you believe it will hel-" The hand she was holding onto suddenly pulled her forward and flattened her lips against her lover's, and her tongue did indeed lap across her own, and it really did feel better.

The kiss was broken as quickly and surprisingly as it began, and Monica said to her "I'm guessing it's time for a change in location, huh?" And her embarrassment returned full force.

All she could do was amble along behind the taller woman, red in the face, as they made their way down the hall, to the bedroom.


End file.
